2004-12-06 - 8:14 p.m.
the other day, brian and i were both home, doing our own thing, occasionally bumping into one another for a kiss or attention or whining purposes. he stopped me in our workroom/office area and said, "you know, we're going to have to get married."
he then proceeded to explain to me what a girl at work told him about insurance for couples, and how its pretty impossible to get joint coverage unless theres a legal marriage. "fine," i said. i already knew all this. what's the big deal?
later the subject came up again, and i looked at brian and said, "i'm not going to marry you unless you ask me the right way. i want romance. i want a proposal."
he said he'd already proposed to me. i was like no way. a rough grunt would've been more romantic than any conversation we've had on this subject so far.
then he complained that im a hypocrite, because i don't believe in marriage, but i still expect him to do the stereotypical thing. so i told him, i don't care about being asked. i'll ask him too! the only reason i haven't yet is because i think getting married is dumb and a shallow way to prove love or commitment.
so i told him, "let's both do a proposal! we'll both plan secret romantic proposals to suprise each other!"
of course, he didn't like this idea. it involves too much action, risk, and creativity on his part. no, he does not like this idea at all.
too bad!!!
i'm going to plan a romantic, exciting proposal for him, and then he'll have to do one for me. ha.
so i've been brainstorming. this isn't anything that will have to happen soon. we've already been together for more than four years. here are my ideas so far:
1. first, i'll have to butter him up. there are two things brian loves more than anything else: cleanliness and food. so, on the special suprise day, i'll make sure that the whole apartment is spotless and perfect. then he'll be in a good mood.
2. as for the food part, i think it would be better to go somewhere to eat. someplace new? someplace we've been? we haven't really been anywhere too fancy. maybe i'll make him get dressed up for a fancy new place. eek, it will cost a lot, but that's better than getting a cheap, greasy, unromantic burrito.
3. should it happen in madison? should i take him to milwaukee? i dunno yet.
4. so he'll be in a great mood, with the clean house and the fancy food. what else?
5. brian needs to take more risks, i've decided. he needs to try new things. so, that's partially why a new restaurant that actually requires dressing up for is a good idea. but there has to be more. what more? on a limited budget?
6. i definately want to incorporate a "trust walk." its corny, but somewhat adventurous, and can be romantic. its where you blindfold someone, and they trust you to lead them about in safety. i thought i could lead him somewhere really beautiful and scenic, or i could take him somewhere from our past. trouble is, we don't have a lot of scenic places in our past. the best i can think of is a crappy little footbridge looking over a manmade lake. but these are details. at this stage, its all about the concept.
7. so i'll lead him around, and maybe keep feeding him to keep him in a good mood. i'll bring dark chocolate truffles and baklava.
8. then, when we get to romantic spot, i'll take off his blind fold. i figure, by this time, he'll have been waiting for the proposal, but i'll make him wait a little longer. i'll do a little speech thing first. i'll talk about trust and love and romance and the future and being adventurous.
9. then i'll do the asking thing. should i get down on one knee? should i have some kind of shiny jewelery to offer him? not sure yet.
10. obviously, he's going to say yes. we are already committed life partners. i'm not sure exactly when this decision was made, but that's my point against marriage. commitment doesn't happen one day; it grows over time. and here we are.
11. hopefully, all this will not intimidate poor brian. hopefully, he will be inspired to put together his own suprise proposal event. i should probably keep this fairly low key, so he doesn't get scared about disappointing me. god, anything he comes up with would absolutely thrill me.
well, like i said, i've got time to think this through. i want it to be really nice, like picture perfect. i want the two of us dressed nice, because we never dress up for anything. i want lots of aesthetic appeal, because, after all, proposals are aesthetic events anyway. i'll do a little satire thing, and overemphasize the part where i have to woo and convince him. but i'll be serious too, about the loving him part and the commitment part.
