2004-09-06 - 2:20 p.m.
today is going to be a grand day. its early afternoon, and the temp hasnt even hit seventy. very good sign. my run tonight is going to be awesome.
im in a musical, dancy mood today. ive been playing atmosphere and the postal service and dancing around the apartment. the volume is dangerously loud. but i dont care. ive listened to enough of other peoples crappy music - let them listen to my crappy music for once!!!
my neighbors are impossible. i still have a vague campaign going to meet them or at least have a conversation with one of them. i decided that they must be totally inept dorks. i just walked by the front porch and someone was out there reading. i smiled and looked at him, but he didnt lift his head. i mean c'mon, he knew i was walking there. or maybe he was just really into his book. but usually no matter how into a book a person is, he will notice a person with unusually pretty red hair walk about ten feet away from him in an otherwise people-barren neighborhood. argh!!!! i dont know what to do with those folks.
the sun and i dont get along very well. i get burned, i get sweaty, i get irritable. but the sun is the source of all life. my sun issues trouble me. why am i biologically destined to hole up during the day, and only venture out once the sun is down or hidden by gray clouds? i think it would be incredible to have really dark skin. i know thats a totally ignorant statement, but im thinking of the physical freedom id gain. id be fearless. id go sailing at noon. id go running spaghetti strap tank tops. the sun and i would coexist peacefully.
sometimes i really wonder about inherent differences between races. i mean, if things like depression or mathmatical ability are inherited, imagine all the other subtleties that are linked to genes. regardless of society, i wonder if it feels different somehow to have a different set of genes. it must be so. i mean, if i wake up to a hot, bright sun and shudder, while someone with darker skin wakes up and smiles, there must be differences.
im still working on leslie marmon silko's "the almanac of the dead." writers' ability to sense and write totally different people's perspectives is so amazing. i try to imagine sometimes the life of another person, with all the daily details and thoughts and feeling, but i can't get the depth and brilliance.
some day i will have two basenjis (african barkless dogs). they will be named Camus and Silko.
