2005-04-26 - 9:15 p.m.
it's 9:15 - almost my bedtime! so sad! i've got a shot of Copa D'Oro in some decaf, just to get that sleepy feeling going.
only 32 schooldays left! that's 7.5 weeks to go at the middle school.
actually, i'm kind of over the hump right now. i'm done with my lead teaching, and i've finished all the work i need to do for the university.
now that things are winding down, i've finally sought out some mental health care. i went to see a psychologist, and after quizzing me with the usual questions, she immediately told me that i should get medicated. that really surprised me, since she's not a psychiatrist who can prescribe meds. i thought she'd want to try some behavioral therapy first. but she jumped right on the anti-depressants.
i'm kind of pissed about this, mostly because i've been asking my parents about going on medication for over a year now. i've been wavering on the issue, and both my dad and my mom kept telling me that i didn't need anything.
so i told Mom what the therapist said, and Mom was all, "Oh, that makes sense. Your father is on Effexor. Try to get on that, since you've probably got something genetic."
WHAT?!?! all of a sudden, now she's all about the pills?????
i feel like i could've avoided almost losing my mind this semester. i could've done better work, and not have been so scary and hard to work with.
looking farther back, if i had been more balanced, maybe i could've done more with myself. i've spent the last six years avoiding stress, because i can't handle the tiniest thing. but if i'd had some help, maybe i'd be in medical school by now.
i hope this plan works out.
